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Burn the Bridge Back to What Broke You!

accountability achieving addiction attunement boundaries brokeness burning bridges confidence discernment escape routes goals growing health moving forward narc abuse recovery no contact planning recovery relapse risks wise people Jul 16, 2021
burning bridge

What broke you?

Who broke you?

How would you get back to destruction, if you wanted to?

 

One of the keys to reaching your goals is to eliminate any escape routes. It is tempting to retreat to safety and comfort when challenges and difficulties arise. To avoid turning around and abandoning your goals, you must make going forward more compelling than going back.

 

When striving towards a goal, you must focus on what you want to obtain and avoid the impulse to go back to what you know and to what is comfortable. When Spanish Conquistador Hernando Cortez landed in Mexico, one of his first orders to his men was to burn the ships. Cortez was committed to his mission and did not want to allow himself or his men the option of going back to Spain. By removing this option, Cortez and his men were forced to focus on how they could make the mission successful.

 

Eliminating an escape route creates a compelling reason to focus on the goal and to keep moving forward. However, it is important to keep in mind that although Cortez had his men burn the ships, he did not have them burn the food and supplies. Cutting off an escape route to increase motivation and create the desire to press on where you might otherwise give up is totally different from throwing caution to the wind and taking undue risks. Reaching your goals still requires prudent planning and managing.  If you are leaving an addiction or abusive relationship, you need to take the necessary steps to ensure your safety, that of your children and cutting off means of relapse.  This could include changing your phone number, emails, and blocking abusers on social media.  

 

All goals contain a certain degree of risk, but it isn't necessary to create undue risk and stress by not properly planning and thus lacking the necessary tools and supplies to achieve your goal. Take risks, but don't be careless or foolish and simply hope that everything will be okay.

 

 

Before you decide to burn your bridges, make sure you have the supplies and tools necessary to achieve the goals.

Something like quitting your job might sound like a good way to close the escape route, but it might also be a fast way to bankruptcy if you don't have resources to carry you through. Creating a savings account or having a journey job (a job that is a stepping stone to what you really want) allows you to take the risk of leaving your current job without creating undue risk. 

Close off the escape routes and make sure that you have a compelling reason to move forward.

However, at the same time, make sure that you plan for the risk and have the tools, supplies, and resources you need to achieve your goals. You can't eliminate risk but you can plan for it. Don't just jump in without thinking through the process and having a solid plan for moving forward. Surround yourself with wise, attuned, and healthy people who have your best interests at heart.  

I believe in you!

 

Take Me To Some FREEBIES!

Yes, Please!